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[chokuto]

UN: 火
𝐓𝐄𝐗𝐓 / 𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐈𝐎 / 𝐕𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐎 / 𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 / 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐖
𝟖♣ ( 𝑬𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻 𝒐𝒇 𝑪𝑳𝑼𝑩𝑺 )

Comments

@tseng / text

[nonvoting]

Would you like to play twenty questions with me?

[chokuto]

[He sees what you're doing here.]

Again?

[nonvoting]

This time I'll ask the questions.

[chokuto]

I can't really refuse since you went along with it last time.

[nonvoting]

Of course you can refuse, if you don't want to play.

[chokuto]

No, I want to. I was joking.

[nonvoting]

Ah, I see.

[ 🤡 one day he'll get good at reading tone in text. ]

Where are you from?

[chokuto]

My village is called Konoha. It is one of several hidden villages that foster shinobi, and it belongs to the greater Fire Country ruled by a daimyo. I grew up there.

My world doesn't have a name, though I've been told that my language and culture resemble a place from Earth called Japan.

[nonvoting]

That's interesting... I would wonder about mutual intelligibility, if this resort didn't translate everything for us.

Do you consider Konoha to be your home?

[chokuto]

That's a difficult question.

The short answer is: No. I don't think I've thought of it as my home since I was a child.

[nonvoting]

I suspected it might be. It's a difficult question for me, too.

[ sasuke knows, of course, why tseng has a hard time connecting to the idea of "home" in any given place. ]

What was your childhood like?

[chokuto]

[The question is a natural progression, and it will allow Tseng to know more about him. Yet still he hesitates. It would not be fair to divulge as much without warning.]

Are you sure you want to know? It might change your opinion about me.

[nonvoting]

I am sure I want to know. There is very, very little you could say that would make me care for you less.

[chokuto]

[Those words, in the demonstration of Tseng's care and knowing how difficult it is for the man to communicate it, ache in his chest. Perhaps there is some benefit to doing this through a message than in person. It affords a physical distance, so that composure is easier to maintain. And Tseng will not feel pressured toward any specific reaction or response.]

My childhood was difficult. I was raised in a large clan, the Uchiha, that carried an infamous bloodline. Many of us were powerful shinobi. My family was not excluded from this, as my father was the head of the clan, but — my older brother was the most exceptional by far. I looked up to him. I worshiped the ground he walked on for many of those formative years as a child. My feelings for him now are challenging to describe. He is dead, and it was by my hand.

My village used him as a weapon against my clan to bring us under control, because we had schemed against its elders and leaders. We felt wronged in many ways. So they made my brother, with the aid of another, kill all of us — and twisted the story to make it appear that my brother acted independently.

He spared me. I was eight years old. I was alone for a while, and the rest is complicated, but I grew up holding him responsible for the death of my family and my clan. I learned later it wasn't true, though it was too late by then.

It's not a good story. I regret the actions I took while under the influence of my own emotions through the years that followed, but I can't take them back, so all I can do now is atone.

[nonvoting]

[ tseng reads the message, then reads it again, slowly. understanding the great arc of sasuke's life and the points that have defined it. no wonder sasuke struggled so much with vulnerability, for all the hard work he's put into it now. tseng has no family, so he cannot begin to imagine the pain of it—but he can guess that the burden must have been immense, to be the sole survivor of such a catastrophe.

he can see, also, why sasuke would worry that such a story might change the way tseng views him. it doesn't, of course. it could never. ]

I imagine that was a heavy weight to carry alone... Thank you for letting me carry it with you, if only for a moment.

For what it's worth: I believe, strongly, that you are more than just the sum of your sins. Atonement is important, and so is forgiveness; when no one is left to forgive you, it falls to you to forgive yourself, one day. When you're ready.

Do you believe in fate?

[chokuto]

[That response is... kind. He should have expected it from Tseng, for all he has come to know about the man, but still it lights a warmth in him, like a tiny candle flame. Sharing his story is not something he does often — people either already know or don't care to learn more — but he sees he made the right decision here, at least.]

I trust you.

You're asking complicated questions. Honestly, I don't know. I should, but it's difficult to consider the context of my life from that perspective. Do you?

[nonvoting]

I'm glad. I trust you too.

I don't think so. I don't like the feeling of disempowerment that comes with it. I prefer to take responsibility for my choices, and for the outcomes of those choices. To blame it on fate would be to deny myself that agency.

I'm not sure if that makes sense. I'll ask a less complicated question, next.

[chokuto]

[Tseng does have a point — it's difficult to look at the history of his own past and think that all of it was fated to happen. Perhaps certain details, such as his connections to others, but beyond that... He doesn't think so.]

I don't mind complicated questions from you.

But, go ahead. What's next?

[nonvoting]

What is your favorite food?

[chokuto]

Okaka onigiri is good. It's an easy meal, and filling enough on its own.

Fish is something you can reliably catch in the wild, so it's a convenient choice when you're on the move and looking for a water source, and it's not difficult to prepare either.

I also like tomatoes.

[Did you enjoy this very thorough answer?]

[nonvoting]

[ yes it was perfect ty. ]

I remember the onigiri. That was the flavor you chose when you brought me breakfast.

Do you like eggs?

That isn't one of my questions. I just want to make you breakfast one day.

[chokuto]

I like them, though I haven't had any in a while.

[Cy is a lazy vegan, or something]

You aren't doing it because I did it for you, are you? I wouldn't want you to feel like you owe me breakfast. I don't make food for people out of obligation.

[nonvoting]

[ a pause. ]

Is there something about... the way I speak with you or behave towards you that makes you feel as though I view our relationship as transactional?

If there is, I want to correct it immediately.

[chokuto]

[Ah.]

No. Sorry.

It's not you — consider it my own bad habit. I'm not used to this.

[nonvoting]

It's all right. I don't ever want to make you feel that way, and if I do, I want you to tell me—but I also can't fault you for finding it difficult to accept my affection, sometimes. Ramuh knows I struggle too.

Because it bears repeating: I care about you, and I enjoy spending time with you. I don't think I owe you breakfast, but I would nonetheless enjoy eating breakfast with you.

Please let me make you tomato eggs sometime. I think you'll like them.